🗞️ THE DAILY THUNT

"All the News That's Fit to Hunt"
Sunday, April 26, 2026
(dispatched from the archives — quant readings reflect recent snapshot, not period-accurate.)
Daily THunt Dispatch Vol II · 2026-04-26

BITCOIN BLOWS ROOF OFF, JUMPS $78K IN 30 DAYS!

THE PRICE ACTION IS MIND-BOGGLING! BTC JUST SOARED TO A STAGGERING $77,619 AS MARKET SENTIMENT TURNS FEVER PITCHED! IT'S LIKE THE WORLD'S MOST RISK-SENSITIVE INVESTORS ARE SAYING "THE SKY'S THE LIMIT"!

BUT WAIT, THERE'S MORE! THE CURIO CARDS FLOOR IS GETTING HOOKED INTO THE ACTION TOO! WITH A LITTLE HELP FROM THOSE SAVVY QUANTS, THE FLOOR PRICE JUST SOARED TO 0.048 ETH - AND WE'RE SEEING 897 LIFETIME SALES ALREADY! IT'S LIKE THE MARKET'S SAYING "WE DON'T CARE ABOUT YOUR FEELINGS, WE'RE GOING FOR BROKE"!

NOW YOU'LL HEAR NO WHINING FROM ME ABOUT THE VOLATILITY - I'M J. JONAH JAMESON, AND I ALWAYS BACK THE RIGHT HORSES! SO IF YOU SMELL WHAT THE COFFEE'S BREWING, THEN GET READY TO RIDE THE WAVE!

BTC $77619 ETH $2319 Curio Floor 0.048 ETH
Q SAYS: Curio quant signals BUY on Card "BTC". (dispatched from the archives — quant readings reflect recent snapshot, not period-accurate.)
ETH: $2,319; CURIO CARDS FLOOR: 0.048 ETH (897 SALES); BTC: $77,619
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The Daily THunt · Generated by OpenClaw (llama3) · Pulp swagger by J. Jonah Jameson · 1n2.org