Unknown Speaker  00:00
Rudolph Giuliani is rich enough to keep alive says the most expensive health care system are oppressive women killing Saudi fascist military rulers are welcome in my house says the queen in the UK 23 billion pounds robbery at the Bank of England, Northern, landless peasant slaves, state execution prices rise to 170,000 times per day person. Hello robot slaves Abarth Welcome to the fucking news. I'm fast and furious. Here are the headlines tonight. In the USA front runner for Republican presidential nomination of Rudolph Giuliani has announced the amazing success of free market economics, who is responsible for saving his life in a recent radio advertisement in his campaign to be president of the areas of the planet designated as the United States of America by deceased nationalists. Rudolph states, his chances of surviving prostate cancer in a crappy British socialized healthcare were at best 5050 Fortunately for Mr. Giuliani, his fantastic wealth allows him to buy the very best doctors with the very best drugs in the very best hospitals, thus saving the world from the tragedy of another slimy selfish rich fucker dying needlessly before their time. current news Mr. Giuliani we checked your bank balance and you're going to live yes it's testament to the great civilization we have built that we value the lives of our fellow humans and dollars they have not exquisite beauty as living organisms the universe to 14 billion years to make you ugly poor fuckers. Yeah, let them die if they ain't got the money, huh? What are those people with national health care systems thinking looking after penniless humans with no thought or concern for how much money they have? Goodness me you might even keep the poor people alive by mistake. Oh foolish. Rudolph's other campaign themes may not include the following. You know, once people get old, they're not much use, are they? Maybe we could kill them and eat them. I'm just saying, you know, the unemployed people on welfare and other non rich landless peasants bucks cash would just lock them in the factories and make them work for food. I mean, there's no such thing as a free ride. When you're born into this monopoly of banking families and landowners. It's your duty to die a slave in our fake economy. Right? So vote for me if you're on the list, and I'll serve myself and my fellow wealthy individuals even more Trump tastic big food. Now fuck off and vote me back in again. You stupid person. Fucks God bless America. See, Kyle. I mean, the fatherland the homeland. You know what I mean? In other stories around the world, fascist royal leaders of oppressive regimes are welcome at my house says leader of the Saudi Arabian royal family. When he met the Queen on a state visit to crappy Britain this week, the Queen and the Prince enjoyed a brief discussion on the relative merits of our kingdoms. They did not say this to each other.

Unknown Speaker  03:03
We may not have a lot of oil, but our wealth and privilege is assured by our ability to make expensive killing machines. Our bones, missiles, machine guns, trucks and other apparatus of tyranny is just what you need to oppress your people and continue to fuck your persons over for a buck. As long as you need our guns and bombs and we need your oil and you are murdering evil unelected killers are welcome in the Queen's House. Now come and sit at my table and enjoy the fruits of the fruits of my family's bison your rule over the stupid peasant fucks of crappy Britain. Oh,

Unknown Speaker  03:40
thank you new egg lame hive tastic mother of all workers, we have lots of oil and we don't give a fuck how much you don't like it. We don't need your thin veneer of freedom for our person. Phox we just kill them, torture them and lock them up. We oppress our women by an opposition and feed the population lies about heritage and tradition where we steal the wealth of the land for ourselves and our cronies. If you're lucky, we'll let you be our crony and we'll slip you a few billion every now and then for being a good dog now bring on the dancing girls and make these protesters fuck off. In the UK, the Bank of England has given away 23 billion taxpayers pounds to the northern Rob Banking Corporation, and promised at least another 20 billion just in case they need it. No statement concerning this has been me by the government, but we can imagine what they might give would go something like this. And now the economy is very complicated and you probably won't understand it so we're not going to explain it now. Keep going to work and pay for your pitiful lives while we allow business to rape your Aspera money anytime it feels horribly awful. What's that? I have to explain so we can pretend it to democracy okay, but just this one's okay, so the banks gambled your money away hoping to make themselves a nice little wedge, but they fucked up and now they've got no money. So we let the stupid reckless shysters run their scam in our country. So the peasants blame us now, we've decided that all of you will give them the money back that they lost so they can carry on screwing people for money and spinning out the fake economy delusion just a little longer, while we build the Spaceships that will take us to serious and our eternal life of luxury. Just ignore that last bit. Only kidding. No, it's Rachel three actually. Just joking. In a completely unrelated story, the Metropolitan Police Commissioner, so I'm not resigning. I'm a fucking Mason leave it at go Ivan Allah Blair has announced the price increases for state execution in the United Kingdom. This follows the slaughter of John showers the Menendez in the London tube train and the fine for endangering the public health whilst carrying out their botched job, sir, I'm not resigning I'm a fucking Mason leave it don't go having a laugh. Blair didn't say this. If society wants an unregulated, inept police force of thugs poorly managed by overpaid, inefficient idiots that society wants knee jerk heavy handed poorly coordinated operations like the one that killed this poor innocent brown person who looked a bit like the brown person we really wanted to kill, and then society will have to pay for it. It all costs money. You know, you can't have armed nutters running around London not knowing what brown person to kill without spending a bit of dosh Nodame banks and now the weather. Soaring oil prices and massive debt are building up over in America. So economic recession, societal upheaval and genocidal war for resources are quite likely in the next few years. Have a nice weekend.


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