World War Three happening soon says President Bush because God can't wait to get on with World War four, five and six humanity to split into two sub species stupid Buckers and really stupid photos in the UK more people must die in Afghanistan says Gordon Brown Prime Minister of the landless peasants of Britain under the rule of Nazi aristocracy and ready to die in large numbers whenever our majesty says so. Hello, debt slaves of Earth. Welcome to the fucking news. I'm free to choose. Here are tonight's headlines. President Bush raised the specter of World War Three recently when he said around the teeny nuclear weapons raises the risk of world war three. If Iran had nuclear weapon, it'd be a dangerous threat to world peace who said as you can see, the world is a very peaceful place at the moment, especially here in the Middle East. So I told the five people if you're interested in avoiding World War Three seems like you ought to be interested in prevent defying a nuclear Iran. Doesn't that sound like a threat to anyone else? I mean, it takes two nuclear armed nutters to start a nuclear war and I wonder who the other war mongering psycho megalomaniac idiot fuck would be in that scenario? Mr. President, Iran has now built an atom bomb early See, I knew this would happen. I warned the people of Earth they should be interested in preventing this but nobody listened. Now I have no choice but to launch an overwhelming preemptive nuclear strike on that tiny little nation of brown people hastening the End Times initiating the biblical war Gog and Magog and pleasing the Armageddon knights Noah and Armageddon knights argue that America must protect Israel and encourage war to help God fulfill his plans to wit, Armageddon, and the victory of the righteous over Satan's minions. That's us. The thing is world war three already happened. Yep, that's right. Hundreds of nuclear weapons rained down on our for 30 years spreading for loads and radiation all over the planet. So many nuclear warheads exploded on Earth at the background radiation signature of the whole planet has gone up. They called this war, air burst testing and hundreds of atom bombs are exploded in our air during its course. Okay, so they didn't drop bombs on cities. So the death toll was pretty small. Just a few insignificant Pacific Islanders and some communist peasant fucks so bring on World War four five and six because they'll all be good for business. Think of the rebuilding contracts think of the expensive medicines think of all the money countries will have to borrow to beat America in the next war. That's right beat America we're all being lined up to borrow our futures from the banking families of our to fight religious nutters in charge of our biggest arsenal of weapons of mass destruction. Now go to the shops and buy some shit made in China you're complicit sleepwalking zombie flux that will let you know when the dying is ready to start. Till then just keep shopping. shop till you fucking drop. Humanity may split into two sub species in 100,000 years time evolutionary theorist Oliver curry of the London School of Economics expects a genetic upper class of stupid fucks and a dim witted underclass of stupid fucks to emerge. The upper class will be slim, athletic and just intelligent enough to operate the technology and machinery of a technologically advanced super shopping civilization. While the squat ugly, really not very bright subspecies will do all the digging up and shit shoveling necessary to supply the super advanced shopping civilization with a stuff it needs in the shops that have no mention of the few wealthy banking families who will be responsible for lending you the money to buy the shit at reasonable interest rates and to support this utopian society of stupid shopping fucks. Perhaps they're all living on the International Space Station, or they shapeshifted into interdimensional beings exist the outside of matter as a kind of fascist evil energy like that baddie. In the Star Trek episode Futurama did a piss takeoff anyway, let's all go to the shops and buy some shit made in China by economic slaves in the biggest unelected tyranny on Earth and teach our children how to use the system so they don't evolve into the squat, ugly shoppers with mixed jobs sloping foreheads at higher interest rates on their credit cards, slobber slobber, think Frank Frank. In the UK Prime Minister Gordon Brown has called for the international community to share the burden of the military campaign in Afghanistan. That comes during Afghan President Hamid Karzai his visit to Downing Street in the UK. In his statement, Gordon Brown did not say yeah, a lot of young people have died to protect caught from oil and trysts in our country, and to ensure the construction and safety of the oil pipeline being built in North, or, in fact, for many update, we're running out of stupid fuckers who are here to come here and get shot or blown up. The Queen has tried wafting extra whiffs of her reproductive juices into the high, but it's just not working. I call upon all the other countries of NATO, whether they have queens to offer reproductive juices alive or not, to send their young people to Afghanistan to kill brown people and die from the wealthy banking families who own the oil companies that stand to make so much money when we are finally in charge. Only by dying very large numbers can we ensure the shops will stay open and the plastic shed from China made with oil from the dead broke people's countries will continue to flow. So come on, get your fingers out and come and die in Afghanistan for rich fuckers who couldn't care less somebody would be off more on that story later. Thanks. And now the weather. Nuclear Winter radioactive fallout brain followed by fake rapture and the living hell on earth. Have a nice weekend.


Transcribed by https://otter.ai