Unknown Speaker  00:00
Iran to attack Israel after we bombed them say crazy religious Zionists, US sends more troops to die in Afghanistan for oil company providence in the UK war planners order taxpayers to buy them some aircraft carriers. Hello consumer units. Welcome to the fucking news I fully automatic. Here are tonight's headlines. Middle East analysts claim an attack on Israel by Iran would destabilize the region increased stress on American forces in the region, push the price of oil up even further give us an excuse for nuclear Armageddon and usher in the biblical rapture in the

Unknown Speaker  00:38
second coming of Christ.

Unknown Speaker  00:40
Nice comments calm as Iran carried out military exercises in preparation for being bombed by Israel before President Bush leaves office saying this religious nutters have repeatedly claimed that Iran's nuclear program is just the excuse they need since it contravenes the international agreement to let Israel be the only bartering fascist nuclear bully in the region. Over un believes the crisis can be resolved by Iran allowing Israel or America to bomb them back to the Stone Age without retaliation. A spokesperson for the UN gave this imaginary statement earlier today. Hello, everybody. America and Israel have every right to bomb any country they don't like and get away with it. All they have to do is say the country in question was asking for it hell or spilled their drink. Iran should not defend itself against these unprovoked attacks or bother trying to prove the allegations against them are rubbish it is that Iran should gracefully allow its people to be killed in an aerial assault. After all, this ability to stand up to regional bullies and global Netsy super states. It's not a fundamental right. Any other country thinking of selling its oil in euros and telling America to fuck off? should think very carefully before following Iran down this dangerous road of national defense and self interest. jabbers I think you know who we're talking about. Let me just close by saying the UN has an important role to play in world affairs, passing pointless resolutions against military superpowers who killed millions and ignore international laws. It's thanks to the UN that the people of Iraq and Afghanistan can be invaded and occupied without having attacked anyone. The people of Darfur can be raped and killed to make way for Chinese oil exploration. And the people of Palestine can be herded like cattle into the biggest concentration camp on our long list of peace and freedom, Americans freedom to do anything and Israel's piece of the action. interrelated story. President Bush has an anti war troops for the International insecurity persistence force in Afghanistan. Here he is spewing I mean, speaking at the White House, hello, my fellow Americans, there's been a tough month in Afghanistan for viewing significant military pawns dying on behalf of the oil profits, my friends, freedom fighters, that I mean, evil terrorist, insurgent religious fanatics, have regrouped and still resist our occupation, I mean, assistance. And because of this, I will be sending more killers their soldiers to Afghanistan, where after seven years of war, I mean assisting the people, there's still no water, no electricity, and no education for most people. Most of the time, just the way we live by hope the increase in troop numbers will convince the African ease of our commitment to ruling them and killing them occupying their land and not improving their lives in any significant way at all. You'll think after seven years of promising food, water, power and education, while billions are embezzled by corrupt officials and contractors, they would be getting the picture. Anyways, boundless hypocrisy in God bless the United States of military superpower. Now I'll go back to sleep now. In the UK a 4 billion pound contract for two EU aircraft carriers has been confirmed by the government today, Gordon Brown announced the plans at Downing Street in this exclusive interview with fucking us

Unknown Speaker  04:14
a whole lot. Yeah, that fans are threatened well be shafted for years to come in order to supply our armed forces with these carriers who once felt these ships will all I have to project influence across the world. ensuring our ability to fuck with other people's countries if we want to. And our changing world of uncertain future is important. Our military industrial complex keep screwing the taxpayers for billions in an unrelenting slave economy with endless war provides jobs and security. These gaps are symbolic of our desire to kill people, or at least force them to comply with them. wishes to subject them to the rule of our shadowy puppet masters to drop off a constitutional monarchy that underpins your serfdom and Arab wish to come to your country however far away from ours at drop bombs on you all Yeah, God save her majesty and fuck the rest of you insignificant peasants. Three cheers for natural cause of nationalism, all ale military power and the force of arms. You know, you know, I used to be an intellectual, but now I'm just getting of corporate power, and I would sell my dead grandmother to keep my possession of employees saying, fuck off,

Unknown Speaker  05:38
pay your taxes while I suck George Bush's deck. I'm still trying to get a taste that Tony often

Unknown Speaker  05:44
bugs and smell the weather, killing people to continue to the weekend with a chance of a large number of dead people in Iran by the end of the year. Have a nice weekend.


Transcribed by https://otter.ai